Self love…

The other night I was using the restroom at a concert in Pensacola. As usual I was reading all the graffiti on the stall walls. As you know this is usually where women write nasty things about other women or write their initials with their loved ones following it up with 4 ever. One graffitied message caught my eye. In big bold letters, some one wrote, YOU ARE ENOUGH! In a society and world filled with such negativity it is nice to see words of encouragement. This struck a nerve with me that night.

This year has been a rough year for me. I’ve been back and forth with my ex. Someone whom I love immensely but have come to the realization that sometimes loving someone that much isn’t okay if they don’t love you that way. Loving yourself is more important. Let me tell you I don’t love myself. I set ridiculous standards for myself because of society. I tear myself down. All I see is my failures and my faults. In my weakest moments I told myself my ex didn’t love me because I wasn’t enough. Lately I’ve realized that’s not the case. I am enough. It took all the signs for me to realize it. From my teacher, in my candle light yoga class, telling us to remind ourselves that we are enough. The bathroom graffiti. Articles on self love not being what it is portrayed on social media. I’ll say it again, I am enough. I deserve for someone to dread the thought of life without me. I deserve to live a life that’s good and full. Not one that looks good on the surface.

In a world full of everything at your fingertips we’ve got caught up in how we appear rather than how we feel. We see what seems to be perfect relationships but we don’t see what happens behind closed doors. Love is perceived as something that should be easy with sunshine and butterflies. It’s not. Love isn’t just a feeling, it’s an action. It’s choosing to love that person even if they’ve said or done things to hurt you. It’s having easy days, days with tears, and days when you can’t stand the sight of one another. It’s choosing to ignore what society says your relationship should be and make your relationship what you want it to be. It’s not letting yourself get lost in another person. It’s letting yourself be who you are and not being who you think your partner wants you to be. Don’t lose yourself at the cost of being with someone else. If they let you do that do they really love you?

Remember that YOU ARE ENOUGH. Everyone is different and has something special to offer this world. Live a life that’s full. Don’t beat yourself up for not being as crafty as your friend. Or for living at home with your parents to save money. For being single when all your friends are married. For not having figured out what you want to do with your life yet. For not being a size 0. Love yourself. Tell yourself you are enough. Turn your phone off for a day. Remove that toxic friend or situation. Put yourself on a budget. Create a life you don’t need to regularly escape from.

3 thoughts on “Self love…

  1. I’ve been struggling with an on/off thing with my ex as well, and a lot of what you wrote resonated with me, especially the part about my ex not loving me because I wasn’t enough. I totally stumbled across this blog, but thank you, because reading this was what I needed to see exactly when I needed to see it.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. It’s nice to know that it’s something other people are going through. I hope you figure things out and know that you are enough. I’m really glad you stumbled across it and it’s what you needed.

      Like

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