As my 27th year comes to an end I am reflecting on everything I learned this past year. I experienced true heartbreak in 3 completely different forms. The first time was with a relationship ending. Love isn’t always easy and figuring out when to walk away is even harder. I learned a lot about myself this year because of this heart break. As hard as it is to admit I will forever be grateful for all the things that were brought to the surface with that break up. It made me grow in ways I wouldn’t have ever thought possible. It changed me and helped me find out new things I wanted from life.
The second form of heart break was on the medical end. I had two of my dreams in life taken away. While it is completely out of my control and I now am at peace with it, when receiving the news it was devastating. I am no stranger to medically devastating news but having to close the chapter on two of my dreams, one of which I had worked very hard at accomplishing, was a whole different kind of heart break. A feeling I will never be able to put into words.
And the last form was losing my Grandmother. I was able to say goodbye with the only words that could come to mind when she was passing. Naturally I thought of all the things I wish I would’ve said, but at the time “I love you” was what was right. I finally get to celebrate her life this weekend and it’s my last step in saying goodbye.
My year wasn’t just filled with heartbreak. I went a trips and made great memories. I spent quality time with my dogs. I grew closer to friends and released the toxicity that was in my life. I got to be involved in many celebrations of love. Finally being able to share my sisters wedding day with her was amazing. I watched a friend overcome many obstacles and preserve with her head held high. I have never been more proud to call her my friend. She’s the epitome of strength.
I learned how important honesty is and that it will be appreciated in the long run. I am not as afraid as I once was at trying new things. I realized I needed to love myself in order to be happy. Learning how to love myself was not easy but, I finally feel like myself and comfortable in my skin again. I grew a lot in my 27th year. It wasn’t my easiest year but it has been one of the most rewarding. And now I’m 6 minutes away at being one year closer to 30.